An old lady is speeding down a highway, when she spots a police officer with a speed gun.<\/p>\n
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The officer signals for her to pull over, and then walks over and asks her with a smile:<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat\u2019s the rush?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m late for work.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSure,\u201d says the officer, \u201cWhat do you do?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m a rectal distender.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cA what? A rectal distender? And what is that, exactly?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, you see, I start by putting a finger in, then another, then I work up to three fingers, four fingers, until the whole hand is in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then slowly but surely I extend the rectum, until it\u2019s about 6 feet wide.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd what the hell do you do with a 6 feet asshole?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGive him a speed gun and put him by the side of the road.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
An old lady is speeding down a highway, when she spots a police officer with a speed gun. The officer signals for her to pull over, and then walks over and asks her with a smile: \u201cWhat\u2019s the rush?\u201d \u201cI\u2019m late for work.\u201d \u201cSure,\u201d says the officer, \u201cWhat do you do?\u201d \u201cI\u2019m a rectal distender.\u201d…<\/p>\n
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