They thought they had silenced me, but they didn\u2019t know silence is where I build my strength.<\/p>\n
I spent most of that night staring at the ceiling. The apartment was cold in places I hadn\u2019t noticed before\u2014like the floor under the dining table where my feet dangled, or the part of my chest that used to hold hope. But I didn\u2019t cry. Not once.<\/p>\n
The next morning, I woke up with swollen hands and stiff joints. Age is a funny thing. You get used to the aches, the creaks, the betrayals of your own body. What I hadn\u2019t realized until now was how much more painful it was to be betrayed by your heart.<\/p>\n
I made myself oatmeal\u2014the kind Paul used to like as a kid\u2014with raisins and cinnamon. I sat at the tiny round table in my kitchen and tried to eat, but it felt like swallowing regret. I glanced at the photo on my fridge: Paul at graduation, arms flung around Richard, both of them beaming. I\u2019d been the one behind the camera\u2014the one always behind.<\/p>\n
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