“My dear, he’ll take you for a drink, then to a hotel, he’ll caress you, take off your clothes, and he’ll get on top of you to make love. If that happens, I’ll DIE!” The next day, the mom asks:
How was it?”
“You were right, he took me to a hotel, caressed me, undressed me, and when he tried to get on top of me, I told him: ‘NO CHANCE.’”
“Well done, my girl.”
Four married men go fishing. After a while, each starts bragging:
“You can’t imagine what I had to do to come fishing! I promised my wife I’d paint the whole house next weekend.”
“She didn’t let me come until I promised to replace all the tiles around the pool.”
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